September19,2005
[Spirit no.8 Fear]
Life contains two parts which are physical part and mental part. In the fist part which is physical is consisted of cells, muscles, blood and lot of chemicals but in mental part it is composed of vary feelings and emotions . In my opinion, the most effective feeling of people which motivates a person to do or not to do something is fear. The most scariest thing to me is to have no own thoughts and being unable to follow my own desires.
Imagine youve been raised in a family which allow you to do nothing but follow every words that your parents tell you to do so. Imagine, youre living in a society which interfere your life too much by the rules, or the system of society. Imagine that youre indoctrinated with all information and instructions that you have to follow even how to live your life properly. Having no unique ideas , having no own thoughts, everybody acts the same. Nothing new , nothing fresh , you come up with the same old thoughts everyday. how scary.
What caused me to be scared of having no own thoughts and being unable to do what I want is that when I was during the entrance exam to the university, I extremely wanted to study about arts but I was forced to choose the faculty of business administration instead. With high family expectation, I reluctant made decision with no choices. I began my first year university student in faculty of business administration at Mahidol University International College with no joys.
Everything seems so difficult to me, base on my uninterested feeling so I did everything with no attentions. But I still had to study those courses with difficulties because I didnt want to let my parents down. But finally, I gave up. I couldntstand no more, I couldnt made up my mind to do what I really dont want to do. It was such a hard feeling and that made me scared of being unable to follow my own desires and being forced to do something that I hate to do.
The outcome of my actions, that I was forced to do something, was very unsatisfied. I wasted my time for over year and also wasted a lot of money on tuition. But the most important thing was I was given a lessons that how suffering it is if I cant have my own ideas, my own choices and have to do what I hate.
When Ive studied Harrison Bergeron that reminds me to my experience as I mentioned above. Harrison Bergeron represents the system of society in the way that the leaders want it to be and in the way of being easy to control. People in society cant think anything different from what theyve been told. I stated in my reflection on Harrison Bergeron short story that A clear example which supports my opinion is when Hazel tries to persuade George to take off the ear handicap and rest his handicap bag on the pillow and then maybe take some lead balls out . And he replies There you are, The minute people start cheating on laws, what do you think happens to society? From his replying, it implies that George has been educated not to think differently from what he has been taught. He thinks he shouldnt take those things off because the consequence of his actions will affect the whole society in the way of what hed been told. But base on what? Why wouldnt he question that why the government has to try to reduce abilities of some people who have special potential?
And this can be compared to A Rose for Emily that her father rules her life and she finally becomes a dependent person because shes always been told what to do and never think anything by herself. She cant follow her desires, like when there are some guys try to approach her and she seems to have crush on them. But her father drives all those men away. She cannot do anything. Shes suffered from being unable to follow her desires and cannot fight against her father.
In conclusion, being under ones power makes you cant think or act in anyway you want is the most scariest thing to me. Because I personally think that to be able to think and act is the first element of human rights. Without liberty and rights , I dont think we can live our life happily.
[Spirit no.8]
edit @ 2005/09/19 12:43:41
edit @ 2005/09/19 13:58:16
